


One at a time

by RavenBane97



Category: Original Work, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-23
Updated: 2018-05-23
Packaged: 2019-05-13 00:53:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14739038
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RavenBane97/pseuds/RavenBane97
Summary: This is an original short-story inspired by BTS's "I Need you" and " Run"  music videos.Trigger warning: overdose, depressionI would love to know what yous think of it so please leave a comment.R.B





	One at a time

**Author's Note:**

> This is an original short-story inspired by BTS's "I Need you" and " Run" music videos.  
> Trigger warning: overdose, depression
> 
> I would love to know what yous think of it so please leave a comment.
> 
> R.B

Seven.  
Please let me breathe…  
Eight.  
They are supposed to take all this pain away…  
Nine.  
Supposed to silence the loud voices in my head….   
Ten.  
Supposed to unfreeze my numbness….   
Eleven.  
Supposed to make me happy…  
Twelve.  
Supposed to make me forget…  
Thirteen.  
Supposed to make me normal…  
Fourteen.  
I sighted and laid my head on the sofa’s cushion, unseeingly staring at the TV. What’s the point of all this? No matter how many I take I will still remain as messed up as I was before… I didn’t used to be like this. I used to be somewhat normal. I had friends. Good friends. I would go for midnight rides through the bridge, hanged out at the train tracks, laughed, goofed around, read. I can’t even read anymore… I can’t do much this days to be honest. I can’t even recall the last time I got out of this apartment… It’s already a miracle I managed to walk from my bed to the living room. It’s tiring.   
Did I eat today? Yesterday?  
Jamie used to make sure I ate.. I wonder how he has been. I know he moved to New York for college last year. He finally managed to get into Skidmore. Hope he hasn’t been in any fights there… he is too impulsive for his own good.  
Fifteen.  
When we were sixteen he got into this big mess and the six of us ended up fighting a self proclaimed gang in this deserted subway station.  
“Dude, why do you always drag us into your shitty temper tantrums?” Charlie sighted from his spot against the pillar.  
We were waiting for the members of the “ gang” to show up so that we could get things over with.  
“It’s not a temper tantrum, the guy stole one of my cans and when I asked him to return it he fucking punched me. Should I have just let it go? I’m not a pussy.” Jamie hissed.  
“All this circus for a spray can?” Mark asked trying to calm Jamie down, he was too wired up.  
“It took me months to find that shade of blue, alright?”   
“Whatever.”  
“At least you make our lives interesting.” Jay joked patting Jamie’s shoulder.  
“Elli, you’ve got my back?”  
“Don’t I always?” I punched his arm lightly reassuring him.  
“Just checking.” he smirked.  
“Okay children. Let’s be quick, I want to get back to the container as soon as possible.” Steve said cracking his knuckles when the others finally showed up.  
“Sure thing, boss.” We replied and got ready for the confrontation.  
It was an easy fight, usually we are at a disadvantage, we fight on instinct so we end up taking some nasty blows, mostly me. I fought side by side with Jamie, him fighting like a maniac and me finishing off those he let pass and the ones that came directly at me.   
When we got back to the container we started a small bonfire and just chilled for the rest of the night. We knew all those blows were going to be a pain in the ass the next day but what mattered was that we had won .  
These peaceful moments were my favourites. We were all together just enjoying life and each other, no worries, no sorrow. Just seven dumbass teenagers living in the moment.  
Sixteen.  
That container.. I wonder if it’s still like we left it. We used to do everything there, I even lived there for a few months when my aunt kicked me out.   
We were eighteen and definitely too old for sleepovers but who cares about societal views? We will just be ourselves and fuck everybody else. That was our motto. I used to live by it. Used to have less worries, the voices didn’t exist at the time…  
I was half sitting, half laying down on the ugly purple couch we had brought to the container three months before. Damn it was hard to get this thing inside but I guess it will be my new bed now…  
“ She really kicked you out?” Mark asked leaning his head on my right leg.  
“ Yeah, apparently she has finally realised how much of a mistake it has been to look after me all this years. Now that I’m legally an adult, she has done her part.” I sighted letting my head fall into the back of the couch.  
“ Bitch! It’s not like you wanted to live with her either. Stupid crack head.” Jamie grunted.  
“Will you be okay here man? I mean its just a container, not exactly a proper house…”  
“ I will be fine Steve. It’s not for long anyway. I’ve got my part-time job at the gas station and Columbia is offering me a grant for personal expenses, if I participate in a research team so I will be able to rent something cheap.”   
“In Brooklyn, yeah?” Jamie stuttered.  
“Of course! I know I will be going to college in Manhattan but I will just take the subway everyday. Besides it’s cheaper to rent in Brooklyn than in the fancy big apple.” I reassured, we made a promise in middle school. We would move to the city together, and I’m keeping it no matter what. I’m more than capable of commuting for a year.  
“ You will have to wake up super early dude.” Charles added.  
“ I barely sleep anyway.”  
“You should shut that brain down sometimes, you know?”   
“Well Pete, that is the downside of being a genius.” I smirked, knowing it would piss him off.  
“Asshole.”  
“ Takes one to know one.”  
We laughed and played around for hours after that. I knew they were simply trying to distract me from the fact that I had just been kicked out from the only home I have ever known,by the only blood relative I had left. And for that I will always be thankful to them. They made that night bearable.. without them I would have surely cried my eyes out instead of ripping my stomach to shreds with laughter.  
That night we all slept in the container, using each other’s as pillows and taking comfort in each other. We were a family.Who knew we would drift so far apart…  
Seventeen.  
Whenever we were together it was a given that we would mess around and get into trouble which more often than not led to messy escapades. Shit, it almost cost me my job once.  
I was doing a night shift at the gas station when Jamie showed up with a duffel bag filled with spray cans.  
“ How’s it going Elli?”  
“What are you doing?”   
“ I was bored, and thought you might be as well.” he shrugged.  
“Not really. I’ve been enjoying catching up with my TBR.”   
“ Seriously? You would ditch me for books?”  
“Totally.” I smirked.  
“Ouch. I’m hurt.” he mocked, pretending to faint.  
“ What are the cans for?” I asked, stopping his little act.  
“ I noticed your walls were really white.”  
“No.”  
“ Please? I got these new designs that I bet will lighten up this bleak place and maybe cheer you up? I mean you spend most of your time outside in the cold, this way you will at least have something cool to look at.” he pleaded giving me his famous puppy eyes.  
“Jamie…”  
“Yes or no?”  
“Fine, but it has to be in the side wall. There are no cameras there.” I gave up.  
“ Sure thing buddy.”  
“What do you need me to do?”  
“Help me place the stencils on the wall and then just keep watch.” he instructed laying his materials down.  
It has been over an hour since he started and so far so good. I love his designs, they are always meaningful, he doesn’t tag a wall just for the sake of it. He does it to convey a message. It’s fascinating.  
No wonder Banksy is his hero…  
It has always fascinated me how humans always feel the need to express themselves through art. I think that springs from a person’s need to be remembered…  
“Alright. I’m finished. What you think?”  
“What the hell is going on here?” My boss screeched.  
“Run!” I screamed at Jamie.  
“But…”  
“Do it!”  
And he did. I know it was hard for him to leave me behind, but he couldn’t be arrested again, it would damage his college application. My boss was furious! And almost fired me on the spot. Luckily, due to the fact that I was the only person willing to do night shifts in that crappy place I got to keep my job.  
Eighteen..  
The strongest memory I have of our last days was a little while after Jamie’s eighteenth birthday. I had just moved in into this apartment.  
“ You planning on buying a bed?” Jamie asked we had been sitting on my bed staring at the mural he had painted for me as a house warming gift.  
“ I have a bed…”   
“That not a bed. That’s a mattress on the floor.”  
“ It’s a bed.” I sighted rolling my eyes.  
“ It’s not! And don’t say it is, you know I’m right.” he added glaring at me.  
“Whatever.” I muttered and leaned back into the wall.   
I know he is just worried, but for me this is more than enough. I don’t need much. As long as I have my books and my friends I will be fine.  
“Are you happy?” he whispered.  
“Yes. You?”  
“Me too.”   
We spent the rest of the night playing OverWatch and talking about random stuff, simply enjoying our time together.  
Nineteen.  
I don’t remember exactly what made us lose contact with each other, it was a combination of a lot of things. The fight that lead to Jay broking his hand and missing the opportunity to join the pro boxing league and consequently shut us out, Charlie moving out of town, Pete getting arrested, my stupid fight with Jamie…   
“You should stop tagging the streets man, if you continue to get arrested you might not get into college.” I stated taking the can from his hand.  
“I’m simply expressing myself.” he hissed, I know this is a touchy subject but he needs to get his shit together.  
“Well can’t you do that in a drawing book like everyone else?”   
“Screw you!”  
“I know it’s not ideal, but just until you get into Skidmore.”  
“Elliot, you don’t get it.”  
“I’m only worried about you.”  
“Well I never asked you to be.”  
“Fuck you.”  
“ Right back at you.” he left the container and that was the last time I talked to him.  
After that it became awkward for us to even be in the same room together. We were already falling apart and that was the last nail on the coffin.  
Twenty.  
I stopped needing water to swallow the pills a long time ago. I used to need at least a full glass of water to swallow one tiny round tablet but now, I pop them like tick tacks.  
Twenty-one.  
I finished it… I should probably go buy more… but I’m so tired… I will just take a small nap… I tugged the blanket closer to my body and closed my eyes drifting off to the sound of the TV.

Beep…beep…beep…beep…beep…beep…  
My head hurts… it’s like an elephant is having fun stomping on my head… I slowly crack my eyes open and all I see is white. Odd my living room is purple… Why am I so uncomfortable? I’ve slept in the couch so many times it has memorised my body shape… where am I?  
“ Thank god, you’re awake.” I was suddenly engulfed in a hug.  
“ Who…Jamie?” I croaked.   
“ Yes duffus. Thank God you still kept me as your emergency contact.” he whimpered sitting down besides me.  
“Why?… How?”  
“ The hospital called, you overdosed on Xanax. You hadn’t shown up for work in a week so your boss went to look for you at your apartment and found you.”  
“Shit… Why are you here?”  
“Why wouldn’t I be?” He quaked.  
“You’re mad at me.”  
“ I was, and later on I was too embarrassed to face you. And now I get a call in the middle of the night saying you are in the hospital getting your stomach pumped. You fucking moron!” he fumed taking my hand in his.  
“ I…”  
“I texted everyone, they are on their way.” he continued not letting me go.  
“Huh?”  
“ Get ready to have the lecture of your life. I had never heard Steve so angry.”   
“ I…”  
“Get some more sleep. They will be here when you wake up.” he smiled petting my head.  
“I’m…sorry.” I don’t know if I was apologising for the overdose or for what I had said before, perhaps for both…  
When I opened my eyes all six of them were in my room, I never thought I would see them again…I cried and apologised and they all comforted me even though I didn’t deserve it. When I was discharged we all returned to the container and watched the blinding lights of the city.  
We might not be the same but we are still family and I’m not alone anymore.


End file.
